16.07.2011
I still remember that I'm so excited about that day because Mummy promised me to get my lovely laptop and camera. FINALLY! I'ld be able to cancel these two off my wishlist which have stayed there for a long time. BIG SMILE! (:
19.07.2011
That day, I counted. That would be the sixth times I went back Universal Studios to play. It's a Tuesday, with lesser crowd of course. C told me that you'll be working that day but, once again it's just a disappointment. I'm used to it. But, it's still a great day spent with my colleagues afterall!xD
21.07.2011
Today, I'm bored to tears in Darkroom because there're only two people working. PATHETIC. Everything's alright, until the moment we were going home together. C told me. I went silent and smiled. The next moment I really don't feel like talking. I plugged in my earpiece. Pardon me. C and W really tolerated this emotional me. Sorry! But, I really have no mood for anything.
And we went for Mac's AGAIN. And W told me something that should be quite shocking. But, I take it well. I'm quite surprised at myself too, is it because I realised it long ago? Just like yesterday, I saw you'all walking out of the store together happily, I don't understand why I've that kind of feeling. JEALOUSY? I don't know why I start to bother about it? I'm confused.
22.07.2011; 01:00
I feel really vexed now. I can't wait to get everything off my mind. Is it worth it all this while? I've to keep reminding myself not to do something I'ld regret in future. I'm done with it, seriously. I'd fall so many times that I don't bother to get up anymore. People tell me to go after it if I wanted it so much. At least you tried, you've no regrets; they said. No, I don't feel that way, sorry. What's mine is mine, anything that don't belongs to me, would never belong to me no matter how hard I tried. I'ld rather give it up, call me a coward or anything that you want. I don't care. I admit I'm not as brave as you. I'ld still feel this way. Even if you like something so much but you know it don't suit you, why still bother to hold it so tightly and make yourself feel terrible. But still, it's easier to be said than done. The only thing harder than letting go is moving on.
PS: Thanks H! Making me laugh after this long and tiring day. (:
Went to the SIM Enrolment Talk today, totally bored to the max. Can't imagine myself going to have lecture like that. Tell me, how am I going to start school with this kind of attitude. Oh god.
Have to start work tomorrow le, hehe, at least something to look forward to. Catching a movie, Monte Carlo with my dear girls after work. (: It has been a long time since we can go out together after work, miss those days that we can't decide what to eat after work, those good old days that we walked around Vivocity after our dinner. It's all because of the extended working hours to 10pm, that we can't have all these anymore!
Alright, hehe, looking forward to getting new laptop and my lovely camera this coming Saturday! Hope everything would turn out well please. (: And 19th July going back USS to have a CRAZY time for the last time I guess before I leave there. And meeting my dear Ahya on the 22nd July before her school starts. And meeting my dear Zhiting too, hope she could make it on either day. I wished time could freeze now, don't want school to start so soon, still can enjoy my HAPPY TIME!
The hardest battle to fight are the ones with yourself, telling your mind to stop liking him, even your heart still does.
Went to our 老地方today! Had Astons for our lunch, the ambience there is real good! (: Relaxing and peaceful. And we don't need to waste our time queueing up, serving of food is fast as well. hehe. And shop shop there, a new place to hang out to shop! heheh.
And went to Illuma to watch our long-awaiting LADDALAND! Oh god, we got scared so many times! It's a great movie though, but with sad ending. ); Didn't get to drink our favourite, KOI, miss it so muchie! And have our dinner at V8 Cafe, first time eating there, not bad though. Hahah. An Awesome Day! :D
-tomorrow not working too, have to pack my room le, so messy! Oh god!
Next event coming up will be the SIM Enrolment Talk on 11July, make me realise that school is starting soon, have to be prepared.(:
I don't want to let people see the weakest side of me, to let them know how stupid I'm. But, I really can't just keep it to myself, I really have to say it out, to you my dear diary. I really hate myself when I land myself in this kind of shit, when I'm the only one bothering about this. I really have to say I Miss You Masri Chia, every single moment, you know? I cried for a person I don't even talk to before and every time, realising how I've missed the chance again to meet you. We don't have the affinity to even meet. STUPID SZEYEE! Causing yourself so much harm to someone who don't even give a damn about you, not to say to miss you. I'm really sorry, I really want to forget him, but I can't bring myself to do that. Firstly, is your appearance that has attracted me, but after that, realising the past between you and your ex-girlfriend, you really moved me. I have never met a guy like you before, I really thought this kind of guy has already been extinct. Every time I read your blog again, my tears would well up my eyes, you're really a perfect guy. Maybe it's not fate that don't want us to meet, maybe is you who don't want to even see me. Okay, over here maybe I can't promise myself not to miss you, but I'll promise myself to forget you. I still like you, no matter what, till the day you're totally off my mind.
When I say I'm alright, it means I'm not.
When I say I don't care, it means I do care.
When I say I don't bother, it means it still bothers me.
These would be the times that my heart and my mind don't listen to each other, they contradict themselves. So please, know me well. Know when I'm speaking the truth or telling a lie when I myself don't even know how to.
I finally dye my hair again today!:D to copper brown and highlighted it with dark blonde. hehe. Hope it won't be too striking for work. hehe. And today went out and found a tour agency which provides guided tour for Batam trip! YIPPEE! FINALLY! & I told Mummy about that and she kind of let me go le. haha. So, maybe the first week of August, I'll be going Batam for holidays!♥
Kind of pissed off just now. You told me maybe you could change the schedule, in the end you never inform me of anything. And everything is still the same. WHAT'S THIS!! You change the schedule last minute okay? And I do have my own plans alright!
Anyway, tomorrow have to work PM shift and can't meet my secondary school clique le. ); That's alright, I still have to live on with it. Just keep on smiling, alright? (: Expect nothing and you'd be surprised of something.♥
It makes you freaking sad to listen to a sad song when you're feeling sad. But, I'd still listened to it anyway, cuz it sort of calms you down, making you feel somehow peaceful.
It's the first day of July, realising how time has indeed passed so fast. As usual, I've came up with my own wishlist.
♥ Samsung ST700 Camera
♥ Polaroid (still thinking of which model should I get?)
With these, half of my June's pay would be gone. );
July, would be indeed a better month hopefully. Everything's planned. But, that's only for my off days, as of in term of work, please please be good. Let my last month of working be enjoyable please!
-How? I feel like going there again! BAD GIRL! ):
